she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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