recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
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