No stitches, just platelets and will power
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
