I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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