I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Randomize
