I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize