please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
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