True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
