We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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