i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
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he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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