wakey wakey hands off snakey
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
