Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
