KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
