Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
