One girl and one boy is just not enough.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Randomize