normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I stole a fireplace last night.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
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