so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
