She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Randomize
