we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
being pregnant is like rehab
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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