Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
