so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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