I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
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