There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
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