I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Drunk is a universal language darling
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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