2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize