ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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