As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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