there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
