i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
im holly from the hills drunk
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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