my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
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