we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Randomize
