I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize
