Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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