I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
My dick has a subreddit
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
