i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Randomize
