I wish I could punch you in the face.
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
