i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Randomize
