So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
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