Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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