It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
