No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
She bit a glass in half.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Randomize
