we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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