Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
It's just like the Real World with babies
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Randomize