I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
