she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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