You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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