mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
