All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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