Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
