Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
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